A Side of Rice

Hopefully Humorous (and sometimes R-rated) Musings About Life


Dear Rice Family

The other day, a professional cleaning company sent this direct mail piece to my home:
This stock photo looks nothing like us, except for the dad's bushy eyebrows that DO resemble mine if I haven't had 'em waxed in a while
The stock photo looks nothing like us: we have two boys and I’m not a blond. But I must admit that my eyebrows do look like the dad’s if I haven’t had ’em waxed in a while.

As a marketer, I was intrigued by the personalization of the self-mailer. RICE Family was all over the place. And a portion of our street name was on the sign:

However, the house on the brochure looked freakily similar to our neighbor’s house:

After a careful review of the brochure contents, I’d have to say this company is not really focused on who makes the decisions when it comes to cleaning — or to be more accurate, not cleaning — our house:

Because MICHAEL only makes the decisions about the tough stuff … like where to buy the jock straps and cleats for the boys. And whether or not I’m due for an eyebrow wax.