About a week ago, a bunch of funny blogging gals I follow conducted a blog hop. They all wrote about the same thing—what their blogs would have been about if they’d written them in their 20′s. They then linked to one another’s submissions. I will say that after reading the blogs, I may never think of leg warmers, Wham! or Doogie Howser, MD in the same way.
I was surprised I wasn’t asked to join in. But then I realized they probably wanted bloggers with a large following. Followers who aren’t inmates. Or relatives. And especially if that list isn’t mutually exclusive.
I was inspired (even if I wasn’t asked) to put together a synopsis of what my blog would have been about if I’d written it in my 20s. You’ll find links to read their really funny blogs at the end of my (lame ass) list.
So here’s what I would have been pontificating about in my 20s:
- The skills and talents required to swipe a song list from the stage at the end of the concert. Without invoking the ire of bouncers/security. After you’ve had a drink to boost your courage. Or maybe enough alcohol for a righteous buzz. OK, let’s face it…I was completely drunk and I’m surprised I wasn’t given the list in exchange for my panties, which I (repeatedly) offered the band.
- Why dating a guy in a local band [who nobody is interesting in stealing the song list from] is not smart. But it will help you establish a killer line of credit as you underwrite Mr. underachiever’s dream of being Bono. However, Bono can underwrite his own equipment, thank you very much. And wouldn’t building credit be really great if I were actually building it with something that ended up being MINE when the final payment was made?
- Why perms are bad. And the photographic evidence to prove it.
- How to get flattering pictures of yourself with your tongue hanging out. Also known as Zima-infused shenanigans.
- Proper etiquette at wine festivals.
- What to do with the 16 bridesmaids dresses you will end up with after being assured by friends who are getting married, “It’s not prom-y at all, I swear. It will be perfect to wear for future dressy occasions.”. Sure … dressy occasions that require taffeta, satin, unflatteringly placed oversized bows (baby got some serious back!) and dyed-to-match cheap pumps. At least I could afford all the dresses and accessories with my amazing line of credit.
- White water rafting – leave your fears onshore and paddle like hell!
Hmmm. If cool content was important, maybe not being asked had nothing to do with my family’s RAP sheet after all.