If you’d ridden in my car this week on my drive to the Metro station, you would have heard these spontaneous utterances. Some louder than others. And some more profanity-laced than others.
So we need to raise some revenue for the state of Maryland? Well, plant a few trooper here on 270 northbound during HOV lane hours and pull over all the under-the-passenger-limit cheaters flying past my law-abiding ass. Then write them all a damn mega-fine ticket.
If I drive slow enough, I wonder if my husband will get home first and start dinner.
I’ll tell you what your cutie-pie family decal should say. It should say the ‘Ass Family – Jack, Wise, Smart, and Dumb’. And the dog decal should be ‘Licks My’.
Do you really think coming to a complete #$%*-ing stop in the middle of the road where three exits from the parking garage converge at once was brillance on your part? Thanks for the impromtu brake test, you #$%*-er!
More freakin’ rain? I should be piloting an ark instead of driving a minivan.
That sign that says 15 is not the speed limit. It’s the route number for this dual lane highway you’re bringing to a total standstill in rush hour traffic, ass jacket!
Born Right the First Time. Oh, I bet the Tea Party loves that bumper sticker.
I mean, has the quality control division in the license plate review department at the Virginia Motor Vehichle Administration totally given the ‘eff up?