Every year it’s the same old routine when it comes to year-end holiday hoopla. It starts with me taking every Friday off in the month of December so I can bake, shop, mail, pedicure, manicure and all the other traditional holiday activities.
The first Friday I am off, I prepare and mail out about 140 Christmas cards. Nope, that’s not a typo – 140. And just so you know how OCD I am about it, here is a visual – complete with a handy guide.
- Table purchased at Costco for yard sale that we never had. Now converts easily to Christmas card assembly/prep station, so it really wasn’t a waste of money.
- Large size iced tea from Burger King. Gotta pump my body full of caffeine to keep the fa la la la la going at full steam. Wish it was a big glass of Esprussian (special concoction of coffee and Kaluha), but if I’ve gotta pick up the kids later, I need to be able to pass the field sobriety test.
- “Aw” inspiring wallet size picture of Alex and Nick, Christmas pose #1
- Ibid, Christmas pose #2
- Ibid, Christmas pose #3
- Ibid, Christmas pose #4
- Less “aw” inspiring wallet size picture of Alex and Nick, pose #5 in Steelers jerseys
- Oops…still need to mail the renewal to National Geographic magazine. And payment for that photo enforcement fine my husband got for speeding in the work zone.
- Stack of holiday cards stuffed and addressed. Damn, I know a lot of people with the last name A though E
- Variety of holiday cards to choose from so that I can mix it up. Includes one card that doesn’t mention the word Christmas or have any holly, trees, red/green, wreathes, Santas, stockings, reindeer, etc., that will be sent to non-celebrating and mixed religion households
- Red and green Sharpies to address the outer envelope. Blue one in there also, for same reason as above.
- Bag of trash for envelopes I screw up, metalic pen explosions that result in the ruination of a Christmas card, edges of pictures I cut off and about 16 Reece’s peanut butter cup wrappers. Hey, a girl’s gotta start the day with a good breakfast, right?
- The most recently addressed Christmas card, all ready to add to item #9
- Silver and gold metallic markers for writing the personalized holiday greeting on the inside of each card.
- Envelope seals, in a variety of shapes, colors, holiday sentiments. Desparately try to match them to the card style, but not always successful.
- Ha! I’ve been looking for that Target receipt with instructions for online survey and a chance to win a $5,000 shopping spree.
- Tape for the “picture frame” cards so that the wallet-size photos fit in the $%!*-ing 4″ x 6″ space. Make mental note to read fine print on package more carefully next year when buying cards that frame pictures.
- Return address labels, in a variety of styles and colors. Including the generic snowflake version so as not to offend the non-Christmas celebrators.
- Address list of all those who receive a card, including spouse/partner names and kids.
- Box that holds the forever holiday stamps, and the 4 stamps needed for Canadian recipients. Additional metallic pens in case I run out or have another unfortunate “explosion” incident. Additional Sharpies for envelope addressing (red gave out awful early this year!)
- Storage container (out of picture, but within arm’s reach) with the 20 extra boxes of holiday cards once I begin running out of the first team (see item #10).
- Holiday stationary to print the barf-inducing “here’s how wonderful our life was this year” update that gets stuffed in (most) cards.
If you think this is bad, you should see how I spend the second Friday of December….